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I feel pretty black right now. Very blank actually. Sometimes like I am not myself. Well, for starters, let's start with something depressing: I did not get the solo. I was contemplating who would. And I was thinking  California, Me, or the other girl. Then I got to qwuah and I looked at a different girl and I thought "Oh, I forgot about her" And something just told me that it was her who would get it. But she is really nice, but no solo material-ish. I dunno. But I didn't feel utterly depressed. I just. Felt. Blank. I felt blank and I still do. So  then I went to the bathroom and texted California who got the solo.

I felt like a weight was lifted. But that is okay even if I do feel bummed about it. There's nothing I can do. At all so I just have to move forward, and don't look back. At least is was not California or the other girl that got it. Then I probably would have been hurt. But with the other other girl getting it, I feel relieved and not angry. Not jealous. There are other opurtunites for stuff. Even though I have no idea where, but I will get there someday. I still have the Glee solo to try out for. And I hope the girl that got the solo does not try out because that would be unfair that she got both solos. This is my chance to shine, and this is what I want. More than the 8th Grade Solo. So wish me luck by checking the cool box. Now, even though it is raining, I am going to go steal some lilacs from someone's yard. 

☾їηḋℯґυηẕ℮ḽ♥